Enchanted Hairdom

So, what's not to like in "Twilight"?

Everything.

Except Rob Pattinson. And his enchanted hair that seems to have a life of its own.

Always flowing, always graceful. Shiny, luminous, expressive. I bet if it tries to be somebody else's hair---let's say, Cher's curly, dingy mane in "Mask"---it would win an Oscar for Best Actor. Or screenplay since its incandescence tells a story. A story of---

This bitch is running out of worship.

So, what's worse than Twilight? It's fans. Some bitches in front of me were quoting the book and replying to most of Edward's cheesefest. What's scary, scarier than the movie (though I am aware that it's not a horror flick) (though I would've wanted it to be one instead of a 90210 meets Charmed meets that Gerald-Kim show on Sunday afternoons) is that they want to be Bela, that self-centered sullen thingy who always looks like she's on the verge of something nasty.

Great going Meyer. You just wrote one of the neediest female characters of all time that high school girls now look up to and aspire to become. I can just imagine the slum books (meron pa ba nito? My edge is showing!) Ambition: to be vampire lover. Bela, the vampire lover. Heh. Buffy would so kick your ass to kingdom come.

Blech. My head's all over the place. It's the hair I tell you.

I actually have no problems with the movie. It is what it is. But it's the hordes and hordes mad fans mooing endlessly how great the story is (or how magnificent the books are). Namurr. Ang chaks sobra ng dialogues and when I took a peek at the book, I almost fell into a coma. It's spineless, it delights in weakness.

Why am I even writing about this?

Oh the hair. Yeah.